Hikaru's Story
by Emo Lover 15
Summary: Hikaru Ukitaka has had a rough life she has run away from the soul scoiety for being blamed for her mothers death, has now grown up with Ichigo without him knowing who she really is what will happen when her past comes back to haunt her Oc/Toshiro
1. Summary of my life!

CH 1

It was the same as always, me waking up in the morning (or being forced to by Shiro ). Then getting ready for school me putting on my uniform , making Shiro's breakfeast, and then going to this boring school to learn things I already know.

Shiro says that if I go to school it would give me a better cover so **they **won't find me. I'm not saying that it's a bad idea I mean I can talk with Ichigo all day and keep an eye on him without him even knowing it.

I still, even today, never wanted him to be involved with the shinigami world , that cruel world that took away my smile that everyone sayed made me look like an angel. I used to love that place, everytime I looked outside to see the birds and watch nature do it's course.

I also loved it when Byakuya came and visited me or I visited him I used to think of him as my only real friend in the world. Well since your brother was captian of squad 9 (Kensei) and both your parents being captians , my mother is the captian for squad 2 and my dad for 13.

So when your whole family is full of captians ,even my own grandfather the head captian, you never get very much family time but my mother and father did try . My brother never did really care for me and never even had one of those sister complex's.

I was always guarded b/c my mother is the daughter of the Headcaptian Yamamato , so she is very important but many people fear my mother very much so she only had very many people for friends it was also tough for me because I looked exactly like her.

But Byakuya didn't seem to mind, it was also wierd for me b/c my the only people who cared for me wanted somthing or pittited me ,which I hate, but i lived through it.

Well let me tell you my mothers name i guess i should also tell you who shiro is. My mother name is Saya Yamamato and Shiro is Shiro Kuichiki he was a cousin of Byakuya.

But as I said before it was a normal day in the human world even though Ichigo doesn't even know that I am a shinigami. What's good is that just like Ichigo i got rid of my spiritual pressure and so when Rukia or even Uryu can't even tell what I am.

So now I dont have to worry about the shinigami world finding me.

I was walking down the street when I heard a usuall screaming high pitch voice, I turned to look and was meeted with mushy flesh in my face. Of course it was Orihime she always greeted me this way so almost every day I almost die from suffication.

"Hi Hikaru-chan!" Orihime said while I was still in her mountain of mushy breasts trying to break free and speak at the same time but she was holding on to me tightly.

"Let GO ORIHIME!" I yelled at her still trying to get away, she finally let go when I heard a small chuckle from behind and turned to see the usuall carrot top trying not laugh his guts out.

"What the hell are you laughing at strawberry!" I yelled at him , he looked up at me not laughing anymore but with anger in his eyes "What the hell did you just call me!" He said.

We started to throw punches at each other when Uryu stopped us both with coughing "Sorry to intrude on your little love fest but we are going to be late to school b/c of you now." Uryu said.

I looked at the time on my cellphone and gasped it was almost close to eight and we were not even close to the school. "Oh SHIT!" I yelled and turned to run everyone did the same and we were running for our lives. We got there just in time for the bell and before we knew it was lunch time already and we were on the rouf eating.

"Hikaru-chan! Do you want to go grocery shopping with me after school ,and then you and Tatsuki can have dinner with me!" Orihime said , I thought about the disgusting things Orihime makes and even thinking about it made me want to hurrel.

"NO thanks Orihime I already have plans for after school so sorry." I said , she looked a bit sad but shook it off "OKIE DOKIE THEN!" she said with a goofy smile but of course Tatsuki just had to go to make Orihime happy.

We were all talking just like we always did , just then Rukia's phone went off she flipped it open to see what it was and looked at Ichigo and he nodded that could only mean one thing. That A HALLOW was near they both nodded and stood up and Ichigo said "Sorry guys me and Rukia have to go do something." Everyone looked at them then Chad said " Ok guys don't be long" he gave Ichigo a look (through his hair I guess) but Ichigo still nodded understanding that he meant not to get into to much trouble and not to worry them by taking to long.

They stormed off to go take care of the hollow while took the time to find a an exuse to go an follow them without anyone becoming suspicous then my phone rang I looked to see who it was and it was Shiro texting me. I opened my phone to read it and was suprised to see he had wrote _Tell them that you have to go home to feed me ...Even though it's true ;P._

Boy that is a stupid excuse and boy did I want to kill that son of a bitch. But it was the only excuse i had and they really actually believed it so i ran out of the building and tried to follow the presence of the hollow. I found it just when the started to fight it I watched the whole thing start to finish .

I only watch him b/c I never really wanted him to be a soulreaper from the start. I didn't want him to go to that world were everyone thought that I killed her and didn't even listen to my story, they all just looked at me as if i was a demon and a killer .

It was like they never beilieved in me for a second , sometimes I think they just pitied me and that's all never felt one speek of love never even the people who had hated her wanted me dead thinking I killed her, and no I did not kill her , I guess your wondering who I am talking about the person I am talking is my own mother.

Yes they thought I killed my own mother my own flesh and blood and no I did not (and if you have even been watching the episodes of Bleach you probably already know who did) and I watched her die though right in front of me I remember how she looked at me and I saw the light escape from her eyes.

I loved my mother she was the only other person in the world who knew how it was to be looked at like you were a monster. Like you were nothing just because you looked diffrent I loved how she would just smile off to them and act like nothing was wrong and they were the crazy ones it always made me laugh how she would call them stupid behind there backs.

I also liked it when she said "Don't listen to them they are just jealous of how strong and beutiful we are" she would say in a fake snobish way she would just laugh after saying that and she would walk me around the soul scoiety.

I still miss that I didn't get the chance to be trained by her she was always a good fighter since she always lived up to being the head capitians daughter and also the capitian of squad 2 but to put it all together I just loved my mother to death!


	2. Same old regular life!

Opening Chu-Bura

CH 2  
>I was still watching as Ichigo and Rukia finished up the hollow and were getting ready to go back to the school.<br>"Why the hell do I have to take care of these stupid weaklings!" Ichigo said, Rukia glared at him and said "Because it's your job as a shinigami! And you need to stop nagging all the time about the weak ones it's not my fault we keep getting these, just be glad it wasn't an Escpada." She saidnow looking at her phone keying the report back to the soul scoiety.  
>Ichigo just hmphed at her and then they were walking in silence. I still can't believe that they still havn't noticed me yet, Ichigo really needs to work on sensing spiritual pressure. But Rukia should have noticed me but I guess I am that good at hiding it.<br>I went a ways ahead of them and started to walk back to the school every one was still on the roof having lunch and really didn't even notice me coming back so I took this chance to finally eat my lunch without Orihime jumping on me all the time.  
>Soon Ichigo and Rukia came back but lunch had just ended and we were going to our last classes for the day. (just going to skip to when school is over)<br>As soon as school ended and I was ready to go home I ran out of the building as fast as I could or to make look normal only to be stopped by one of the teachers. "Excuse me... Ukitaka-san?" She said I gave her a cute adorable smile and tried to look like a child "Yes sensei?" I said .  
>Her face did not react instead she looked annoyed. She looked at me up and down stopped at my hair and my eye color. "Why have not washed out that dye and taken out those colored contacts yet?" She said glaring at me. This happenes every time people think that my snow white hair and blood red eyes are all fake and also think ,like Ichigo that I am a trouble maker or yankee, but just like always I tell them "Sensei this is my real hair color and this is the real color of my eyes I keep telling you this but you keep thinking that I am lieing.<br>She keeped looking at me and finally said "You are lieing again Ukitaka!" she said I was starting to get annoyed now this was maybe the 100 time she has yelled your lieing at me. And each time I keep losing my cool.  
>I had finally gotten out of the grip of the evil bitch teacher and was finally on my way home when I felt the pressence of a hollow. I turned around but saw nothing i turned back walking home but keeping my guard up. <em>Could it be just a regular hollow or could it be a Escpada! <em>While I was thinking I felt it again but this time I knew it wasn't a hollow it was somthing much stronger than that.  
>I slowly turned to look and saw Grimmjow and Ulquiorra floating in the sky looking over the city.<br>"What the hell are we doing in the world of the living again!" Grimmjow said , Ulquiorra just sighed and said "We are looking for a person who Lord Izen said is very important for our plan. He wanted us to look for a person who looked similar to this photo he gave us." He took out the photo and said "We are looking for a person with white hair fair skin and red eyes."  
>OH...My...God, how did Izen find me and more importantly how did he know that I was in the world of the living. I have to get home and tell Shiro that we are in major lockdown now I mean what the hell are we supposed to do now! I stopped freaking out and started to calm down and started to calmly walk down the street to my apartment trying to keep my spiritual pressure in check so they could not notice the person they were going to have to hunt down was right beneath their noses.<br>...Two hours later...  
>I had finally reached my house when I opened the door I was meet with a giant pare of breast in my face. "Oh Hikaru-chan welcom home" she screamed and started to pick me up and spin me around while I was still in her cleavege.<br>"Let go Orihime!" I growled pushing on her chest and jumping back to the ground getting my balance back. I heard giggling from the other room and went in to see who it was and saw Ichigo laughing his guts out. "Looks like your having fun squirt" he yelled.  
>I got mad by this and jumped on to his sholder making him go down on his stomack while I put him into a head lock chocking him "What did you say Strawberry!" I roared and we were both at it now we started to throw punches at each other.<br>Someone coughed in the background and I turned to see Renji Abarai, Rangiku, and Toshiro Hitsuguya standing in my living room. "Hello Hikaru-san" said Rangiku coming up to me "You look so cute your like a girl version of Captian" she squealed "Motsumoto!" Hitsuguya said and she stopped in her tracks and I'm glad b/c i would have punched her in the face in a second.  
>"Can't you see she is annoyed by that" he said giving Rangiku an evil glare. She pouted and backed away and stood by Toshiro "Hello we are friends of Kurosaki-san" Rangiku said, they all told me there names which I already knew but they didn't know that. "Hikaru-chan we were wondering if you could let them stay for a while here until they have to go back to there home in hokkaido" Orihime said she said hokkaido so she wouldn't say soul scoiety I looked at her and almost smiled she was always so innocent and I could never say no to her "Fine they can stay for a while" I said and she ran over to me and hugged me "thank you Hikaru-chan" she said.<br>While they others where talking in the living room I went into my room and sat at my desk and booted up to soul scoiety database to see if they had recorded the showing up of the Escpada but when I went on there, there was nothing of any Escpada showing up . "but how I saw them with my own eyes havethey found a way to go around the soul scoiety data base but thats impossible they can even track the where abouts of a single soul but how did they get past them unless ... there is a mole in the soul scoiety ." I said.

there we go this chapter 2 so what will happen next. We got toshiro, renji, and rangiku in the house now how are we going to hide this from them and also we got two Escpada looking for Hikaru what is she going to do now!  
>by the way Hikaru is the same height as toshiro.<p> 


	3. What am I going to do!

Opening Ichirin no Hana

How is this possible though there is a mole in the soul scoiety! Unless this person was actually with Izen in the first place like Gin? This is bad real bad this person could tell Izen anything! He could even tell him what we will do when the war between us starts!  
>I have to find Shiro fast and tell him what's going on!<p>

I thought to myself and started for my bedroom door and raced down the hall, "Where are you going to Hikaru-chan?" Orihime said she had on a carefree face but I saw the worried look in her eyes and said "Just going to look for Shiro a bit he isn't supposed to be out this long.

She looked at me still looking a little worried and asked "Do you want me to help look for him?" I shook my head and said "no thanks I only be out for a bit" Then i ran out of the house at normalspeed but when I hit the pavement IFlashedsteped from one place to the other and keeped yelling Shiro .

Finally the idiot showed up in his cat form looking annoyed, "What the hell is it you keep yelling for me like an idiot you know someone could hear someone we really don't want to hear like Yoruichi perhaps he said and tried to hit me in his cat form but I doged it.

"Yea whatever we got bigger problems then that!" I yelled at him "And where the hell have you been anyway and don't give me that crap aboat you not being gone that long well you have been gone for hours now we have three problems now big ones!" I yelled at him he looked shocked and taken back

"Ok then so tell me what these big problems are then" He said I took in a deep breath and said "Well first off Renji, Rangiku, and Toshiro are going to be staying at our house until they go back to the soul scoiety so you have to stay in that form for a while until they leave, Second apparently Izen now knows that I am living in the human world and has sent Grimmjow and Ulquiorra after me , and third and last off there is a mole in the soul scoiety and that person has the power to tell Izen anything about the soul scoiety even our battle strategy when we go to war with the Escpada!" I screamed and he was just stunned and could only say "So what do you...suppose we do." he said.

I could only look at him and then I bent down to my knees and said "I don't know, I don't know what to do!" I screamed at him and he jumped back taken by suprise.

He changed from his cat to human form his name was shiro but you could tell nothing about him was white. He had black hair and looked just Byakuya so much they could be twins instead of cousins.

"Well I guess we can handle the little problem of shinigami staying in our home but I don't know about the other two we might just make you take a leave of abbsense from school and tell the others that you just don't feel like going to school and I know they would understand since Ichigo has been taking so many days off." He said

"Yea I can do that but the leave of abbsense might make the Shinigami think somthing is wrong." I said he looked at me then we jumped up and landed up on a flat roof of a building and looked out to the town and looked at the moon then he asked "Don't you miss it sometimes... I mean the life of a shinigami." I looked at him out of the corner of my eye and just chuckled a little and said " Of course I do actually I mean I was born to do it and I know my mother would have wanted to train and have become as strong as her" I looked out to the city smilling a little.

"Hikaru you know we will have to go back some day, not today but some day soon I think." he said looking very serious then looked at me with it. I just stared at him for a while but soon said "I know we will, I also know that one day we will have to tell the others about us." Then we just stayed silent and looked over the town just thinking about our plan and what will happen to the future.

He said "Do you still think about the day Izen murdered your mother."  
>I just stared out at the night sky and at the moon thinking of that night seeing my mother die right before my eyes and me so helpless and weak not being able to help her at all soon minutes turned into hours when I finally said "Yeah I do, some times I even have nightmares still" looking away from the town and turning around and putting my elbows on the metal bar and leaning back.<p>

Soon we went back and everyone was still up waiting Shiro had changed back into his cat form. I still thought it was wierd that his hair was black but when he changed into a cat he was actually white!

"Hikaru-chan welcome back I see you finally found Shiro you must have had a hard time looking for him since you were gone for 2 or 3 hours!" she said now holding Shiro and of course he was cudling into her chest purring like a perverted idiot like Kon.

Of course I couldn't hurt him infront of everyone but I was annoyed of him treating her like he was so getting hit later. "Yea it was like he didn't want to even come home or somthing maybe he's sick let's put him back outside then I said getting payback for him treating her like that so picked him up by the neck and kicked him outside happily smiling a little.

"Hey Hikaru-chan is something wrong you have been acting funny since you came back from school today." Orihime said looking worried I gave her reasurring look and said "I'm fine just thinking about stuff , I might take a leave of abscense from school soon so I'm just going to school tommorow to pick up my homework for a few days."

"Are you sure that's all?" she said still giving me her usuall worried look. "Yes I am fine Orihime." I said since she was sitting on the floor and I was standing up I patted her on the head like an older sister would do to a little sister.

"What is pipsqueak acting like a big sister now to Orihime!" Ichigo said and I turned to look at him and said "Yea I wanted to take a break from being Momma's boy Onee-san for a little while!" I snarled at him and this just blew his top off and he tried to run at me but I just stepped away from him fast enough for him to run into the wall and hit him square in the face.

"Ahahahahaha! I bet that hurt strawberry! Ahahahaha!" I said and Renji and Rangiku were also lauging Toshiro was also smirking and trying to hold his laugh in like an adult.  
>"Are you ok Kurosaki-kun!" Orihime said running to him.<p>

I just smirked one last time and turned on my heals and went to my room to sleep knowing Shiro would be there but stopped in the hall and said "Oh and Toshiro, Rangiku, and Renji the guest rooms are down this hall this room the first door on the right is mine so you can just decide betweenthese three over here in which one you would like, also the bathroom is the last door down there in the middle so just to tell you.

And with I bid you all a good night make sure to lock the door when you leave Ichigo, Orihime and Ichigo walk Orihime home don't make her walk by herself!" I said pointing at him giving him a warning look and then stepping in my room closing the door and locking my door.

I took off my jacket that I was wearing and looked on my bed and who do I see no other than Shiro of course looking pissed because I kicked him out. "What the hell did you do that for Hikaru." He said then I clamped my hand over his mouth to shut him up. "

I did that b/c of what you were doing to Orihime you looked like Kon out there I said and of course he pouted even though he was Byakuya's cousin he didn't act a thing like him.  
>When Shiro was finally asleep in his cat form, I looked back on the computer for the people who had grown in rank when Izen had become captian and I finally found some people who had but one only caught my eye a man with green hair and gold eye his name was Takashi Rintarou he looked like a serious man.<p>

"So are the little spy then mister Rintarou" I said "Damnit what the hell am I going to do about this I just can't leave it like this!" I said in a whisper tone making sure not to wake anyone but I guess it didn't do any good because there was a knock at my door I turned off my computer and answerd it.

"Is somthing wrong Ukitaka-san" said Toshiro looking worried and was wearing a tank top and long pajama pants with his hair ruffled with bed head.

"No nothings wrong just thinking out loud sorry to wake you Toshiro and you don't have to call Ukitaka call me Hikaru." I said and we just looked at each other I wonder if it was awkward for him or somthing since I was also just wear a tank top with pants but I wasn't wearing a bra so he could probly see them "Ok then Hikaru he said and I don't know why but I actually blushed when he smirked when he said my name then I watched as he walked back to his room and closed his door.

I closed my door and went back to bed this time I would just have to think about it tommorow then I guess. Then I slowly went sleep slowly falling uncounsious knowing of the nightmare I was about to have. 


	4. My nightmare! Or vision?

Opening: After Dark

I can still remember the day that it happened, it was just like any other day I was in the safty of my home in the head captian district. I never really went anywhere around the scoity since I was the The Head Capitians grandaughter and as allways had guards every where around the place not letting go anywhere.  
>I can still remeber the lonliness that I always felt there, barly anyone ever visited me the only people who ever came was my mother, Shiro, Byakuya, and on rare accasions my father and brother. But thats bc of when I actually stayed in the head house other times I ran off to see everyone.  
>But even when I went to see people they were mostly busy, Byakuya was usually practicing with Shiro but they would stop for a break and talk with me even play with me when I wanted to back then I was a very funny active girl and always smiled.<br>My mother and father where captians so they barly had any time for me neither did my brother ,but they stilled cared for me and wanted to protect me.  
>I still gor lonly but I just gave everyone a smile to let them know that I didn't care and was happy but deep down I was really crying and yelling out for someone to help me out of this darkness sure everyone that I passed gave me a smile but I knew , I knew that as soon as I turned my back that they would glare at me and call me and evil little monster.<br>Since I had snow white hair and smooth skin, and also what scared everyone the most was my blood red eyes that looked like that I was glaring at you and was the devils child so no one wanted to be around me.

I remember i was in my room sitting at my table eating sweets (since I love them so much) and looking at all of the slide doors and watching all of the eary shadows on the other side knowing that they were the guards that my grandfather had placed to guard me.

I listiened to them talk about the rumurs about me and how they wished they weren't assigned to this job of guarding me, and also saying that I was the devil's child or reincarnate or some other kind of crap. I just sighed and was waiting for the perfect chance to go to my hiding spot I use to get out of here and go and play with byakuya and Shiro.

I smiled to myself and giggled and smiled, the men outside gasped when they heard me giggle and just giggled even more I meen I don't look evil even though I have white hair and red blood eyes and look just like my mother. I was also just a kid then too, soon I was pushed out of my thinking when I heard a gasp at the door or one of them and turned around to the back door to see it. "No...It can't be you why are doing this luietanant Aizen!" One of the people yelled and then bright red splattered on the screen and I gasped when blood keeped appearing like ghost on each of the screen walls they were all splashed in like sprayed blood from wounds and they just keeped appearing.

"Please move he said to the one last guard in the infront of my front door I just sat in my seat frozen with fear gripping the pillow I was sitting then I hear the the guard say "No Aizen we were ordered to protect Lady Hikaru with our life by the Head Capitian and if that means to kill you then i will." I started to think in my head who this Aizen guy was then I remembered he was a luitanent my mother knew him and she has spoken with quite alot I have also spoken with him a few times myself i have also seen Gin with him a few times too.

I could hear the clinking of sword and then what unfroze me was the splash of blood from the last guard who yelled in pain. I stood up and ran to my hiding spot and ran out the back door and kepped running trying to think of where everyone is and how to get help.

Then I remembered that Byakuya and Shiro were supposed to be training and sometimes there grandfather would watch them I sure hope he's there if he's not then I'm so dead.

I was still running when I heard a soft laugh then turned to see the man Aizen who had brown hair and was wearing glasses and he was in his luitanant uniform next to him was Gin with his usuall smile and was not looking at me instead he was looking at the ground.

"Well, well I guess we finally caught our little princess" Aizen said "I'm so sorry that we could not take you in a more ellegant way instead of you having to see all those pore innocent people who were supposed to protect you but it was your fault that they died anyway since they put there lives on the line for you."

I glared at him and just shook my head and said " You might as well stop with the mind games they won't work on me I mean have you forgotten who my mother is."

He glared right back at me and pushed up his glasses and said "Yes I am very aware who your mother is what do you think I want to capture you for." I just looked at him blankly and said "Nope not a clue" Gin sighed and put his head in his hands and Aizen had gotten even more angry.

"Well I guess you wouldn't know of course since know one has wanted to tell you thinking you would really become a monster , but I guess now is not the time to tell even so I suggest you just come with us and then we will tell you everything but if you still want to resist then we will have to take you by force."

He glanced at Gin and nodded toward me meaning to attack and bind me. It looked like Gin didn't want to do it wich was strange but I shoock it out of my head and then took out the smock bomm Yourichi had givien me during the training with my brother. I lifted it up into the air and threw it near Gin feet wich took them both by suprise then the air filled with smoke and then when I knew they couldn't see me I lowered my spiritual pressure even though I only had a little at the time but enough for me to become a luitanate, and took this chance to run.

I jumped into the sky and started to jump from roof top to rooftop using flash step. I looked to see if anyone was following me but didn't sense any spirirtual pressure so kepped running toward where the training grounds but then something that I didn't expect to happen there was an explosin behind me.

The air was pushed out of me and then I was pushed forward smashing into a marble wall. Everything went black and then I could feal the blood flowing into my mouth and coughed it up making it splash and before I knew it I was on the ground spitting blood out like it was vomit.

Know I knew what had happened he had apparently thrown some bomb he had with him at me I couldn't sit here anymore and forced myself up and continued to run even though every time I had stop I had to get on all fours and cough blood. _I have to find help soon or elese I'm going to pass out from blood loss. _I pushed myself forward though trying to feel the slightest pressence of spiritual pressure but for some reason I couldn't find anyone then thought there is supposed to be a big meeting today that was why there was more guards today b/c they knew they wouldn't be able to come and protect me if anything happened.

That must also be the reason he attached today as well so that means no one is out here to help not even a third seat. I wanted to curse but I couldn't account of the blood I kepped vomiting out of my mouth so that means that I am going to have to go hide in the woods and heal my wounds then and if I do go to the captians meeting room everyone will probably think I'm crazy and lock me in a cell for good and I knew they would do it this was only a good reason for them to finally lock the demon child away and throw the key away to settle their worries.

I had finally gotten to the forest and didn't feel anypressence of a hollow so laid to rest on a tree. ( Me in pressent time is watching this like a movie but something is happening that she doesn't recognize "What's going on this didn't happen before but...could this be a vizion instead of a nightmare.") minutes past then it turned to and hour when I woke up ,my child self in the vizion, to voices that I could here in the distant. _I must be near on of the disstricts for the all of the souls. _they started to get closer and I could make out a male and female voice they sounded like kids.

I could only open my eyes a little to finally see them the girl was a little taller than me and was wearing a uniform for the school for the training soul reapers she had brown hair tied into a ponytail she had kind eyes and was staring at a small boy my size and we were probably the same size he had spiky white hair and turquoise eyes.

The girl had glance over my way and gave out a little scream the boy looked back at her since he was walking ahead of her he looked back her with worry in his eyes and then stared at the direction she was staring at and then our eyes locked he had a shocked expression on his face when he saw me.

After staring at me for a few seconds they finally ran over to me and the girl let out a sigh of realife when she saw that I was alive but worried even more when the boy had tolled her I was barly alive he said to pick me up and carry me to their house but after she picked me up I let out a scream of pain the girl flinched the boy just lifted my head and had whispered somthing into my ear "Just live with it a little longer don't worry we will get you some help soon. But after that I had passed out.

I could feel coolness but also the warmness of a blanket i was forcing my eyes open and saw a old looking sealing I forced to look over to my side and saw the girl from earlier sitting on the floor fanning herself off her sleves rolled up like she had been doing work Then relized i didn't feel any pain she must have been healing me all this time.

She was still looking outside and the boy was nowhere in sight so I stood up and noticed my hair had fallen from it's ponytail that I had it in so my white locks fell to the floor and circled around me. She must have heard me shuffling and turned but I guess she just expected me to be turning in my sleep instead of having to face a pair of piercing crimson eyes.

"Oh...Your awake...Um...Are feeling better. I'm just wondering b/c I'm still training with my healing powers and I didn't know if I was doing it right or not." She said squirming around were she sat and looked down at her folded legs and was almost blushing from imberrisment.

I just looked at her as if she were an idiot then I looked down and saw that the wound had fully closed and there was no blood at all and she had aparently changed my clothes to normal clothes like she was now wearing.

"It's fine you did a good job for just a trainy but that doesn't mean for you not to train harder." I said and I guess it was her turn to look at me like I was crazy "Wow you sure act grown up don't you i'm mean how old are you anyway I bet your the same age as Shiro-chan" she said while smiling and puting her hands toghether. "Shiro-chan? If you don't mind me asking who is that." I said with my buisness smile that I gave all the people at the society who annoyed me. "Oh he's my best friend we have been friends for a long time he was the one who helped me with taking out of the woods and brining you back here." She said and with a long pause she asked the same question everyone asked when they first saw me "Is that your real hair color? " She said and then I got pissed and said "Yes it is and I really wish you would stop looking at me like that." I snapped and almost halfed snarled at her she jumped back at me when I hear a male voice from behind me the same voice from the woods. "Don't scare her dumbass he yelled at me and I turned to see a boy about the same age and height as me and also with snow white hair as well except he had turquoise eyes that made him look like he was the snow woman's child.

But when I saw him I felt the pressence of little soul pressure emmiting from him. _"So he has a little soul pressure he might become a shinigami as well as his friend here she doesn't have much but she could become a luitanant if she tried hard enough."_

He was still glaring at me and I just glared right back me and we stayed like that until his friend stood between us and said " enough you two and it's alright Shiro-chan I just said something that had uffened her. So it's my fault there so don't be mean to her even though she is better she might still be sick so be nice to her and stop with the glaring." But we were still glaring at each other.

"so then since we have met each other why don't we tell each other our names instead of glaring and fliping each other off." She said then I just looked away from him and said "Fine my name is Hikaru Ukitaka and I'm guessing you're Shiro-chan." I said while looking at the white haired boy he was angered by this and said " The name is Toshiro Hitsuguaya not **Shiro-chan!" **

The girl hit the boy on top the head and said "And I am Momo Hinamori It's nice to meet you Hikaru-san." She said while holding out her hand and shaking my hand in hers I just looked at her as if she were stupid and smirked and said "Sure Nice to meet you." I looked at Toshiro and said the same thing but he just same here and hmphed and looked away and walked out of the room.

_Well this might be fun let's see what will happen while I stay here. _


	5. Embarrassing moments!

Hikaru's Story Ch 5

It has been a day and a half I guess since the whole incident with Aizen and there has been no sign of him finding me...Yet.

But I'm still not going to let my guard down for all I know he could be watching me this very moment and I wouldn't even know but there is another thing i'm worried. What has he told my family and everyone else in the soul society about what happened has he told them I have gone crazy and just started to attack and kill those guards he killed and also would they believe him?

I let out a big sigh and stood up and felt the soft grass under my feet and started to walk toward the woods and wanted to walk some to think. Since Toshiro and Momo had gone out to buy watermelon they weren't here so there was nothing to do.

I looked up at the top of the trees and watched as the sun peeked through them and heard the birds chirp, the summer bugs making there usual noises and felt the warmness of the sun and wished none of this had happened.

I started to think why did this happen, what are Aizen and his true intensions is he trying to use me to get to my mother or grandfather or someone else, and what for what could he possibly gain from using me?

I had all these questions but not a single answer. I put my head in my hands and sat near a tall tree then pulled my knees up and put my arms around them , hugging them and put my head down and started, for the first time in a while now, the trinkle of tears escaping my eyes.

"What am I supposed to do I don't even have that much training I don't even have a zanpakto!" I said while crying my eyes out. I cried for a good five minutes and then started to hikup , I was starting to stop when I heard the sound of russeling and turned to sound of it. It was Toshiro , I saw his white hair and then saw his turquoise eyes come into view he looked worried, but then his eyes rested on me and saw that i was not hurt some of that worry left but the came back ten fold when he saw that I was crying.

He didn't say anything for a second just came over to me to take a once over of me to make sure I alright. He sat there for a second just staring off into the woods and then when we both didn't say anything for a few minutes and I was getting tired of the silence I said "You know I didn't mean to yell at her you know, and if I said anything to make her sad I'm sorry."

He didnt' say anything just kept looking at the woods "You don't have to be sorry she knew you had to have been in a bad mood since the way we found you. Are you alright?" He finaly said and had finaly asked if I was alright "Yea I'm fine it's nothing " I said putting note to it that I didn't want to talk about it and he didn't push on that he wanted to know or if he actually wanted to know.

We sat there some more and didn't talk for a while more until I said "Do you get mistreated for your hair and eye color too?" I knew this had to be a tough subject but hey what else is there to talk about?

He thought about this for awhile and finaly said "Yea I usually do but it's fine I'm guessing you do to since your asking?" "Yea usually do to but just shake them off ." I said then I finally stood up and so did he we just stared at each other now like we were studing each other I stared his turquoise eyes and he probably stared at my crimson eyes.

I studied his silver white hair and saw how it looked in the sun, it shined like silver and was actually really pretty it remined me of my family and how they all how had white hair except for my father who had black hair but because of his illness it turned white but I guess it still counted.

We had both looked away from each other now when he said "We should probably get back before Momo gets worried." I nodded in response and we both went toward to the house were we meet with a perky brunett with juice coming off her face "Shiro-chan , Hikaru-san hurry or there is not going to be any watermelon left!" She yelled and started to wave at us to hurry up. The watermelon was actually good.

...

Soon night came and everyone wanted to go to bed but of course I was wide awake. I sighed and then roled over and got up and then went outside to get some fresh air, it was a little cold outside and my hair was still untied and it was flowing in a beutiful waves of silver. I stood under the giant white moon and then felt a sudden gust of cold air then felt a massive amount of spiritual pressure and immedialtly knew whose it was. Toshiro wasn't doing a very good job of keeping pressure but i guess he didn't even know he had spiritual pressure I creeped into his room and saw how he was breathing peacfully even though the room was filling up with ice covering the walls.

I even had to admit that he actually looked really hot while he was asleep he looked really peaceful and how I wished I could be in his place, I put a hand over his head and tried to put some of my pressure into him trying to control it but it wasn't working. So I thought about how to improve it then remembered what my brother had told me was good way to do it but when I did I blushed bright red the only way to hide it was to ... sleep next to the person.

I was red as a tomato but it was to keep Aizen away because if he caught sight of Toshiro's spiritual pressure he would not only find me but also find Toshiro and might even hurt him and I knew I couldn't bare that even if I didn't know why so just took a deep breath and puled his covers back slowly and krept in with him and tried to push away his cold but the cold was really sothing and had actually numbed my brain so I couldn't think about Aizen or so to speak I guess but it was really sothing and what suprised me was when Toshiro had put his arms around me while he was still sleeping my blush reddened even more and then I was thinking about pushing away from him but it still felt really good for someone to hold me during all the things that had happened.

Before I knew it though I had fallen asleep and then I my true self had fallen out of the vision that I was having and had fallen back into the truth of the real world now dealing with the same kind of problems that had happened so many years ago but now they were even worse.

The only question was... what the hell was I supposed to do about it?

I sat up in my bed and began to blush remembering the part of when I sleeped next to Toshiro and blushed even harder when I knew he was just right down the hall. I let out a sigh and got out of the bed and began to walk over to the dresser to see that my hair was all made with bed head. I brushed it out angrly and started off to the shower.

I knocked to make sure no one was in there and stepped inside I put my clothes on the shelf and stood next to the faucet and turned the hot water on and felt the warm water wash over my boddy.

When I was finally done I felt a little better and started to dry my hair with a towel and turned and went to get my clothes but was met bumped into somthing that I really didn't want to see ... It was of course Toshiro who was only wearing a towel around his waist and was on the floor looking at me the same way I was looking at him totally freaked out!

We both and I'm sure turned bright red I quickly put the towel tightly around me and said "What the hell why didn't you knock you bastard!" I said in a panicked way and he said "I did and there wasn't an answer so I came in why didn't you answer you stupid idiot!" He yelled back at me and we just stood up and I quickly ran out of the room bumping into him and said "What ever!" over my shoulder and ran over to my room.

I shut the door or more like slammed it and was breathing heavly and I was sure I was really blushing now and then just shook my head _What the hell why didn't I hear him he sure as hell didn't knock I'm sure I would have heard him _I said in my head and just humphed and started to put my uniform on and was sure I was not going to look forward to the new day today.

**Hello everyone this Emolover15 here to tell you all to make sure you knew that I will try to update regularly and am sorry for any misspelled words and also that I do not own bleach or any characters besides Hikaru so please keep reading my story thank you Later!**


	6. Heart Breaking Memories

Ch 6

When I said that I wasn't going to have a good day to day I was serious because right now I am in the principle office watching as the angry man infront of me was glaring at me like I was some kind of deliquent. He was pacing back and forth in the room and had a vein pulsing in his head , I watched him move back and forth , back and forth.

He finally stoped and looked me directly in the eyes and was glaring hard but I just gave him the same look but mine was even harder and he backed away getting even more angry. "Do you know why you are here Miss Ukitaka-san" , the man in front of me said still glaring.

I looked calmly at the man now and said "I don't know, you tell me b/c I sure as hell want to know so that I can get out of here." He was even more angry now "Why you little brat you are supposed to give your resprect to your teachers little lady ..." I cut him off and yelled "Who the hell are you calling little you stupid old man" He looked taken back and just stared at me in shock and I stood up "I know why I am here , it's because of my hair and eyes and I will tell you for the hundrenth time this is my natural color of eyes and hair I was born with them so please stop asking me!"

And with that I left the yelling man and principle with their mouths wide open I opened the door and a wave of kids fell to the floor mainly all my friends and also I could tell that Toshiro was there and I was already blushing from the incident this morning and looked away from him and walked over everyone ignoring the yelps of pain and continued to walk down the hall with everyone tailing behind me asking what happend.

...

Lunch had already began and everyone had already heard what had happened and also had heard about my little rant on the teacher calling me short. I was finishing the bento Shiro had made me secretly without the others knowing.

Orihime was talking about going to her house again to have her special dinner , I quickly declined and left it at that because I was now trying to think about important matters than thinking about eating her rancid food or think about the little moment that had happened between me and Toshiro this morning.

He had not told anyone what had happened and I really didn't expect him to. But now thinking about Toshiro had gotten me to think about the vision that I had last night and if it was a vision and it was a part of my memory that I had forgotten what other things were I forgetting and did Toshiro remeber me?

There was a pain in my chest for forgetting him and also the thought of him forgetting me I didn't like the thought one bit. Everyone was talking about school and homework when somthing had hit me like a giant bolder and been pushed on my shoulders ... It was spiritual pressure and it was great , then a massive door had opened up before us and I reconized it amediatly it was the gate way to the soul scoiety and someone was coming through and I had nowhere to hide.

I was starting to feel the fear building inside me and was getting ready to make a mad dash when I saw the capitian of squad 11 Kenpachi coming through and breathed a sigh of relief but the fear had still not gone away.

I had only met Kenpachi once when he was training under my grandfather he had tried to make me scared of him but I only laughed him off, wich suprised him, and told him that he remined me of my brother but remembering this was only making me sad since I was thinking about my brother and how he was turned into a Vizard.

Kenpachi was standing over everyone all of the others who didn't know what was going on I tried to blend in with ,and tried to keep my balance and was slowly gaining my strengh. "Hey Kurosaki" He said in a very low voice which remined me of the first day we met.

"Yo, Kenpachi what's up" Ichigo said without thinking of course. He quickly closed his mouth and covered it with his hand while everyone looked at him like he was crazy "What's wrong Ichigo" someone said Ichigo turned around and said nothing and then said "I'm going to go home early see you guys" and with that he ran down the stairs with Rukia, Toshiro, Rongeku, and Renji.

I guess they weren't going to be home tonight so then with everyone already talking about other things I walked down the stairs shortly after them. I found them outside the school with Rukia yelling at Ichigo for what he did and Kenpachi wanting them to stop so he could tell only for all of them to get into one huge mess.

Until Toshiro finaly coughed to get all of their attention which worked "Now that that is settled what is the reason that you are here Capitan Zaraki" Toshiro said with one of his work glares but Kenpachi just humphed at him and said that "Apparently there is a mole in the soul scoity we got this from a annonimus source we don't know who it was and have no idea how to find out either but all we know is that this person has told us that there is a person in the soul scoity who is not giving us imformation about Escpada that we need and when they come into the soul scoity."

Everyone was shocked even more than I was when I found about it at the time it must have been Shiro who leaked it out somehow to the scoiety I am going to have to talk about this with him later.

But now I need to listen to the rest of this "So what does the Head Capitian want us to do about this?" Toshiro said "He wants all of YOU to go and investigate about this around the city and see if you see anything odd." Kenpachi said which only made everyone give him and anger filled look aparently their metting was over but I didn't have time to go back to the roof for lunch instead as soon as Kenpachi left I walked out and walked right past everyone when they were talking but I was trying not to be noticed but failed when Orihime yelled "Hey Hikaru-chan were are you going your not skipping school are you that's bad!" I looked over at her and saw her goofy smile her care free face and my worries faded a little but not much "I'm going home early I don't feel very well anyway." I said she looked at me worryingly and didn't stop until "Are you sure your okay shorty." Ichigo said I looked at him annoyingly and said "What ever Strawberry , It doesn't really matter to you now does it!" I yelled at him and just humphed at him at everyone and was walking home until I felt a hand grip my arm and turn me around.

I looked into bright turquoise eyes that looked so very concerned and heard the sound of a deep male voice that I knew too well "What's wrong with you if it's about this morning I said I was sorry didn't I?" Toshiro said I just looked at him and shook his arm off "No it's not about that you don't have to worry I know you didn't mean it I was just overacting." I said in a calm voice and met my crimson with his Turquoise. He looked at me with so much concern that I thought I was going to melt and I didn't even know why I felt this way I mean just b/c I saw that vision last night doesn't mean that he remembers me ... does he?

"You don't have to worry about me Toshiro I'm fine just having a headache is all I'm just going to go home and sleep it off, I'll meet you all at home tonight after school." I said bye and gave him a soft smile which lifted some of his worriness a little "Yea see ya." he said going back to the school I watched him go until I couldn't see him anymore mesmerized by him even though he was long gone.

I sighed and began to turn around to go home but stayed right it my tracks realizing who was watching I looked up and saw Grimmjow looking down at me with menacing eyes when our eyes locked he smirked. I quickly looked away and started to walk away only to have now in my path still looking at me with the same look. ". do we have here you must be this little kitten we have been looking for." He said I griped my school bag knowing if I fought him the others would feel my spiritual pressure so I just looked at him with a glare.

He smirked even more and now was looking at me with a sudductive smile "You might look like a little girl but i can see that you are one hundred percent woman huh. I didn't even bat an eye at what he said knowing he was just trying to get me mad remembering what my brother,mother, and even my grandfather said about keeping my anger in check or it will let the enmy know that he has the upper hand.

I fought the feeling of lonliness wishing that they could see me fight and see how hard I have worked to control the power of "Haru" the fallen angel. Yes my sword is named haru it is a sword that was once an angel or haru was once an angel but was cast down from heaven for loving a human but that is a diffrent story all that you need to know now is that it is a very strong sword. I slipped my hand into my pocket wondering my soul candy I had was I could feel it in my pocket getting ready to pull it out getting ready for the fight that was going to start.

Grimmjow saw this and his smirk vanished seeing as how he wasn't going to be able to get into my head. "Now there is no need for that I'm not going to fight you right now if I did i'm sure I would get in trouble for killing you on the spot." He said now i just smirked at him now letting some of my cockiness get out "And what thinks you will be able to kill much less hurt me in any way." I said taking my hand out of my pocket and put it on my hip with the soul candy in hand seeing if I could pesture him into letting him slip up.

He glared at me letting me know I had the upper hand now I smirked at him lets see what going to happen now huh. He started at me with a sprint and was yelling trying to scare me I guess Izen hasn't told him anything about me has he? He tried to punch me but all i had to do was put my hand up to stop him but he put his other hand up using cero I just blankly stared at it and easily moved from his grasp on my other hand and was floating in the air above him he clicked his tonge at me and jumped into the air to try attacking me again but i just doged it again he did this mutiple times until I was getting tired of it I had already saw what he was trying to do he was trying to put me into a corner but it wasn't going to work. I knew i shouldn't have done it but I finally pulled the sould candy up to my mouth and ate it putting me into my shinigami uniform my hair was up into my usuall pony tail I was getting ready for battle when i felt something and I know grimmjow did too it was Ichigo's spiritual power and it was getting closer by the second now i was clicking my tounge "It seems we will be having to postpone this battle for now Grimmjow" I said he looked at me "Yea I guess so I want to go fight the shinigami boy anyway later little kitty " He said and going to the direction of the source of Ichigo's power I didn't want him to fight Ichigo but I knew that Ichigo would have to learn to become stronger if he wanted to protect everyone like he wanted to.

I went to the opposite dirention going to house not caring that I was still in my kimono I stopped at an alley and put my gigy back on i walked a couple of streets not caring were I went but heard the bubbly laughter that I knew I turned around but hid in the croud I turned and saw the green hair and puppy dog face of my brothers former luitanant Mashiro and she was with Hachi. They were picking up bentos aparently for everyone I didn't know what I was doing I guess I was just mad about what was going now I was looking at the two wondering if I followed them would I get the chance to see my brother?

I didn't even think about it and just followed them and walked down the sidewalk and went to there hide out and watched as they pulled the door open showing everyone and my heart just squeezed to death as I saw my brother walking out and having Mashiro glomp him and watched as he just sighed and hit her on top of the head and her pouting. I didn't even flinch when I felt the presence of Shiro coming up form behind me and we both watched in silence until Shiro said "You know he has prob forgivine you since he knows that Izen did it and not you right? I mean since Izen turnd him into a vizard along with his friends shouldn't he feel at least a little ..." "Shut up!" I yelled at him he jumped back in suprise and looked me in suprise since I was glaring at him now even though he knew I didn't blame him for his choice "If my brother has decided to hate me let him hate me as long he is able to live at least this peaceful life I don't care even if I have to give up all of my own freedom for it!" I yelled at him a little to loudly .

He looked at me with hurt in his eyes sometimes I even wonder why he even decided to come with me since he knew what I have been through also sometimes I wish he hadn't come with me giving up the kuchiki name and having to give up the family he still had to come with me and I dont' even know why he only said that it felt like it was the right thing to do.

"Since you feel like this Hikaru-sama then I guess I should tell you since I know that it was your spiritual pressure a while ago and since they have found you that means we will need help since we both know that we will not be able to stop a whole force Escpada so we will have to tell someone of us still be alive and I know you will not tell Ichigo so it will have to be either your brother or Uruhara-san. Take your pick but you will have to pick soon Hikaru-sama." He said I knew he was saying this since I just yelled at him.

I glared at him knowing fully well that he was right but I knew that I didn't want to hurt my brother so I said "We will go tonight then ... to Uruhara's then lets get ready then shall we Shiro?" I said now walking away looking at my brother one more time until I knew that Shiro was getting impatiant and walked away from my brother once again and not looking back.

/

**Here it is the 6 chapter that you have been waiting for thank you for reading and please review and you can also give me hints on what you want to happen since I am new and need help for ideas thanks! **


	7. These Betraying Tears

Ch 7

I was dreading my decision to go to Uruhara's . Shiro kept bugging me not to change my mind at the last second. It had been a long time since a last saw him he might hate me now or he just might have missed me as much as I missed my brother , he was there for me when my father was never not so I guess he is just a second father to me. Him and my mother were also friends she also wanted him to become a capitian. I just hope it goes well and I don't have to end up fighting him to the death.

We were almost there now we could have been there in a few seconds but we both knew not to go quick or they just might sense them to quickly. Soon my nervousness was going to take over and tell me to get the hell out of there so I knew I had to hurry up and get this over with. We were now in front of the store and heading to the back of it to the door and with out spiritual pressure all the way down I finally got the courage to go up to the door to knock on it. I was waiting for a sudden rush of the door to open till I finally relised it was almost midnight and I was walking up to the door of one of the laziest men in the world. I took a big sigh and finally glared at the door until I took a step back and filled my lungs with air "Hikaru-sama what are you..." Shiro said but didn't get to finish until he relised it himself ,or until it came out, "HEY YOU STUPID OLD MAN OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR BEFORE I BREAK IT DOWN! AND YOU BETTER HURRY B/C I DON'T HAVE THAT MUCH OF A WAITING SPAN!" I yelled off the top of my lungs a few seconds later a little boy and girl in pajamas were at the door the boy looked like he was ready to kill someone. "Who the hell are you! And who do you think you are for waking us up so god damn early !" the boy said who had red hair but he quickly shut up when I planted him with an evil glare but the girl still had the look of a shy little girl and was telling the little boy not to yell at strangers.

I finally had enough of standing there glaring at the boy and said "Where is he!" they finally looked at me for once and finally took me in to my white hair to my pale skin and lastly to my crimson red eyes. They were speachless as usual until I finally stepped in and looked around and trying to sense his spritual pressure until I saw the light coming from one room and the faint yell of "Hey Uraru who is it?" and ran for the that door and pulled it open and saw the speachless face of the former man who I had looked up to as a father.

We stood there for a moment until the man I had seen when I saw my brother change and who had also foughten off Izen with Uruahara came in seeing what the matter was and also stood there for a moment and took me in trying to remember were he had seen me before. I finally broke the silence and said "Sorry to wake you up Uruhara but I'm in a little pinch and need some help." He looked even more speachless now and finally said "Hik...hi...Hikaru?" he said and was now slowly walking toward me but I finally said with a sigh "Yes it's me and like I just said I need your help with..." I didn't have time to finish until if was met with...

A giant hug from this laziest man on the planet. "Hikaru I can't believe it's you oh thank god I had really thought you had died during the day of the exicution but thank god you are still alive!" He said and I could have sworn he was crying but when he pulled away his face was completly dry until I realized that it was me that was crying. I couldn't believe that I was crying over this little matter but I guess that's what you get when you finally know that you were once loved a little. He gave me a sad face wondering why I was the one crying probably and not him but I guess he was just a little more special to me than I was to him. Then when I was crying I heard a soft but audio meow from a cat and looked to see a small cat that looked like it was cranking from being woken up but stoped mid yawn when it saw me its eyes going wide until there was a small explosion and I was met with yet another mushy mountain of flesh of Yoruichi the woman who had been trained by my mother when she was young and had seen a dozen times during now "Hikaru-sama ...Hikaru-sama...thank god ...thank god ." she kept saying over and over until I was just hugging her and coaxing her until she finally she stoped crying and I finally had to order her to go get dress and while me and Uruhara finally got down to buisness.

"So as I was saying before all of this.." I said while waving at all the past events of crying and hugging. "I have come here asking for help from you Uruhara the reason for this is that now Izen has found out that I am still alive and now probably wants me in his army to fight along his side and win the soon to be battle." I sighed now realizing how big of a problem it is now. He looked at me for a moment himself and was now taking all of this in as well and had now gotten into his own attire. He was scratching his chin and was thinking "So baisically you want me to help you keep low for awhile right?" He said . "Yea that's baisically the whole deal." I said with a yawn tired from all the crying I did and a little mad at myself for crying like that in the first place. "But you can't tell Ichigo and the others , I've been protecting Ichigo before he was born, I promised his mother to protect him; and since I was unable to keep him away from the soul scoiety I'm just going to have to make sure Izen just doesn't get a hold of him and there is the problem since Izen is now looking for me and has all of his Espada looking for me and one has seen and has told him that I'm near prob. And just b/c of this son of a bitch is trying to get me I'll be damned if he is going to get hold of Ichigo or any of his friends even if that means keeping this secret from them." I said with glare and wasn't suprised to see that his gaze was unchanged.

"So ... I said will you help me or not?" I said with a serious face getting to the point and waiting for his answer watching as he gazed right through me trying to search my face for something I didn't know what. He got up from his seat and and walked over to the screen door and pushed it open and leaned up on the side of the door and looked out into the night sky and looked as if he was just ... I don't know something that seemed easy and didn't even bother him and it made me angry and want to bite his head off. I was about to yell at him when he finally said "Don't you think it would be better to tell them than keep it from them though since if you did tell them then they also would be able to help you and not just us." He said with cool and expresionless face and looked at me with cool eyes.

I just glared at him knowing he was right but only knew half of it anyway and just waved him off and asked the same question again "Are you going to help or not Ukitaka?" I said and looked at him now as I did all those years ago as if he was my father and not just a man I knew from my old life the life I had wanted to escape . That life that was just filled with lonliness from the moment I was born. He looked at me and just sighed and said "Yes I will help you and I will even train you if you want Hikaru I was just saying that it might be better to tell them now then later or they might hate you later. Aren't I right?" He said and I just looked at him all the things I thought a second ago now gone and looked at him as he were a stranger now and just said "No ... Not now and maybe not even later since Ukitaka...I think that soon a great battle is going to happen and I am right in the middle of it and I already now what the outcome said battle is going to be for me ... I know that when this battle ends I will most likely be dead. And I hope to die without them knowing the real truth about me at least until I die and yes I know that this is the cowardly way out but. Ukitaka ... to me Ichigo is like a brother to me a precious brother to me that I don't want to hate me not matter what. He knows what it's like to lose someone precious , knows how it is to lose a mother and blame yourself for it all the time and wish it was yourself and them everything would have better then."

He looked at me for a long time until he just left the room and went back to bed knowing there was nothing to be said about that and soon later me and Shiro left and went back home to find the house in total chaos. Orihime was sitting on the couch tears streaming down her face and I glimpsed at the clock and saw that it was almost past midnight and she was now sitting in my house crying with everyone elese looking woried for some reason. Shiro had changed back into his cat form and now was jumping on the couch with Orihime who was suprised when he all of the sudden appeared and she seemed as if she had seen a ghost. She looked up and saw me and praticly screamed and jumped up and started to hug me to death . Through the of that she had yelled "Guys she came back she's here!" and then heard the footsteps of several people and realized they must have noticed I had left and gotten worried I must have been losing my touch at sneaking around.

Ichigo was the first one to come in and he looked furious. "Where the hell have you been! First thing I know I am at home having dinner and the next thing I know Orihime call me and says she came over to talk with you to see what's been up with you lately to see if she could help. And she called me crying Hikaru! She kept crying saying that she and Toshiro had gone to your room and you had vanished and no where to be found!" I looked at him and saw everyone else come into the room it looked like Orihime and Toshiro had called everyone and now I wasn't just dealing with a really mad Ichigo now I was dealing with a pissed and worried looking Toshiro . A sad and worried looking Orihime and the rest of them just looked pissed off for thinking that I might have been killed or something.

"Fine . Fine . Everyone just calm down for a sec..." I said but couldn't finish until I felt a hand slap me in the face and was now looking down at the floor only to look up and see Rongiku looking at me in the face full of rage and said " What the hell do you mean calm down we thought you were dead Hikaru-chan we thought someone had kidnapped you or something! Do you have any idea what we went through looking for you everywhere just to come home and have to wait for you here until you got back! Or wait to see if you came back!" I just looked at her and I could feel the side of me that wanted to hit her back she had no idea what I have gone through sure the man she loved betrayed her but how can that compete with the thought of the man you love being a murderer huh how would she feel If I told her right this second her loving Gin was actually a murderer hell he even helped Izen kill my mother and even tried to kill me the own grandaughter of her headcaptian.

I glared at her and felt the side of me I hate coming out the me that wanted to tell her who she just slaped and how I could kill her in an instant but I don't I just keep glaring at her and finally speak knowing it would be no use "If I can be so clear I believe it has nothing to do with any of you does it! And who the hell do you think you are Rongiku Motsumoto..." I don't finish knowing it's useless and hating myself for even trying and say noting how toshiro is also on their side against me now "I'm leaving for a couple days don't try asking were b/c I'm not going to tell you we won't be having any connections either for now on you all and me are nothing but strangers ... don't worry Toshiro, Rongiku, and Renji you all are able to stay here for the time being so please stay " I said in a cold voice that made everyone jump and I know what they were thinking that this is not the Hikaru-chan that they know... and their right this is the real Hikaru-chan or in more case Hikaru-sama the royal grandaughter of the headcaptian Yamamoto. And all I can say is that they better get used to it.

I went to my room and went to bed leaving them in awe as I slept the night kepping all of my visions to rest not wanting to extinguish this fire just yet. I woke in the morning and packed my things and first headed to the school early. I was walking up to the school in my causual wear and saw that snuty teacher that always kept nagging about my hair. She looked suprised that I was here so early and also probobly about the fact I wasn't wearing my uniform and looked like I was going to kill someone too. She was about to go on her rant when I put my hand up to stop her and put the note in her hand and said "don't worry I'm leaving the school and please if anyone ask please say that I went to America." I said and was about to walk away when I heard her say "Please come back again." and saw that she was also crying and when I mean also I could feel those damn tears that were streaming down my face , those tears that keep betraying me all the time.

I wonder why?


	8. Mixed Emotions

Ch 8 Mixed emotions

I was tired and sweating like a pig , i kept trying to get my breathing back to normal since I had just used so much spiritual power on one attack I knew that it was stupid and I had to train even harder for me to get stronger to help the soon to be battle. Uruhara was standing over on the side lines watching me train and so was Shiro. He was looking at me with concern but did not entervein since he knew it would only make that more angry.

It has been almost a week since I decided to come here and train I knew Ichigo and the others might not come since they would either be searching for me or doing a little of there own training. I was afraid that Chad and Renji might show up since I have no idea what there planning to do. Uruhara tells me that everyone is really shaken up by my sudden dissapearence esspecially Ichigo and Toshiro. I know why Ichigo is worried since I'm like a sister to him but what about Toshiro ... Is he that worried about me leaving ...Really?

But I soon have to push it out of my mind since I am supposed to be training and silently curse myself for even thinking about it. Since I apparently still have the visions of my past that I must have forgotten I am now starting to remember some of the stuff from back then and know that Toshiro has strong feeling for Momo. And I'm not suprised he does she is almost like an angel she is kind, strong, but somewhat can be used easilly since she was tricked by Izen but i know she loved him so I don't hold anything against her and know she could not be the spy in the soul scoiety... Wait ... I fucking forgot about the freaking spy. How could have i forgotten about one of the most important things I am supposed to be doing GOD DAMNIT!

"Shiro go and look up anything that might be going on in the soul scoiety that seems strange and come and report back to me ASAP!" I yelled after a few moments of thinking "Yes!" He almost pratically yelled after looking at me for a few moments in disbalief he was gone in a flash and then I put my sword away and walked over to Uruhara who was looking at me strangly. "Before coming here we also realized that there might be a spy in the soul scoiety but I think you already know this right?"

He looked at me in surprise and just nodded in a agreement I knew that he was hiding something from me but I didn't ask because I knew he was doing it because he cared for me like a daughter so I just looked at me and waited for him to speak. "Yes," he said after a few moments of looking at me from the rim of his hat.

"We gathered data from the place and saw that there are many spies but I think Shiro might have better luck than we had." He said looking sourful I looked at him and nodded at him in agreement well at least he came out with it instead me beating it out.

Well I thought it was about time for a break so I went up into the shop to go and cool down I made sure that no one was around and started to go to the kitchen till I felt a sudden tingle in the back of my spine … someone was coming and they were getting close with every second it didn't fell like Ichigo it felt familiar but I didn't have time to recognize it so I started to quick step out of the kitchen into the training area.

I felt the door opening and heard some voices upstairs and started to worry "Shit" I cursed to myself quietly and started toward to the door and was getting ready to go up when I saw a huge figure start to clime down and already knew that it was to late and also knew that it was Chad of all people and also I felt Renji with him as well.

I quicked stepped to the side and watched Chad fall on his butt and also heard a quiet "Ow" come from him and stared at him he would probebly feel my presence and if he didn't Renji would so I stared at him waiting for him to notice me. It took him a few seconds to get together and dust himself off but he finally saw me staring at him or I guess glaring at him and looked back in surprise "Ukitaka-san?'' He almost yelled and now looked like he saw a ghost.

"What is it Chad!" I heard Renji yelling down at us he was starting to jump down and I moved back some more in case he decided to use force to the things I was about to tell them. "What…. " He stopped talking to Chad and just stared at me and looked like he also had seen a ghost. "Hikaru?" I guess there was no use hiding it and went into my little princess tsundra mode "That is Ukitaka-sama to you luetanat Abarai!"

He looked at me in surprise and could tell me that the cogs in their heads were prob turning now. "What do you mean … Ukitaka-san." Chad said I was angry and sad that I had to do this how come they couldn't tell form seeing this well they are kinda slow but hated myself for feeling this way. Damn these mixed emotions how come everything in my life is so fucking completed all the fucking time damnit!

I pulled out my sword and pointed it at him and said "Now seeing this should be enough for you both to understand what is going on and now I must ask you two what are doing here?" I watched as they saw my sword come from nowhere like I was a shinigami and now they finally came with the answer.

Now it was up to them to what happens next and now I just wonder can I really keep everyone safe or will I really have to die trying?


	9. Training and my crazy brain

Wow I am so sorry about it being freaking two hole years my mind went completely blank and I wound up forgetting about the story all together I am so sorry!

Ch 9.

Chad and Renji continued to look at the sword and me for almost a whole minute until Renji screamed, "What!?" Chad looked shocked as well but stayed silent from his last outburst. My hand continued to point the sword at my two friends (well chad is more of a friend than Renji I would have to say).

"Alright, alright, now there is now need for this kind of action Hikaru", Uruhara said behind me but I quickly turned away from him and continued to look at the two men as if they were nothing but enemy's to me. "What is it that you want" , I said in a fierce voice and I could notice Chad flinching slightly from it b/c I knew he was not heard me speak so fiercely before. "We came to train down here to get stronger since everyone else is also training." Renji said to me in a monotone voice. "Now are you going to answer MY question to why you are here and while everyone is searching for you." He said in an angry voice to me but it only made me even angrier. "I do not have to answer your question Lieutenant , just b/c you answered mine does not mean I am ablidged to answer yours." I said in an even tone noticing how Renji began to glare at me even harder.

I did not have time for this damnit! I had things to do and one of them was not to sit and chat with these two! I curtly turned from them to get back to my training but of course it would not be that easy with these two. "Hey we ain't through talkin!" Renji yelled at me from behind. I stopped in my tracks and began to think quickly and finally sighed realizing what I had to do. I turned slightly and from just the right angle glared hard at the two before releasing a major amount of soul energy. The both of them crumbled to the floor with shocked looks of what almost looked like fear. I thought of my words carefully before I spoke. "Yes we are… You two never saw me here and if you even speak a word to the others of this I will personally come after the two of you!" I yelled angrily at them.

They were both taken aback form my word since it was obvious that I never spoke like this…like a captain of a squad would. "Now leave!" I roared at the pair before turning once more to go back to my training, not looking back again.

I could hear the both of them leave and also heard Uruhara doing something to them knowing it must be one of his gadgets to make them forget that they saw me and told them to come back another time for training. I continued my training and worked through out the week trying desperately not to think about anything BUT training. It was of course hard since every time I went to sleep I would see memory's coming back each night of Toshiro. But with every memory came with hurt that I knew Toshiro would never love me how he loves Momo.

Shiro finally came back with the information from the Soul Society. He said that there was indeed few people who were working for Aizen, giving him info for who knows how long. He said that he had caught at least three of them and was now looking for the rest. I was for once relived that something, even if it was only slightly, was going right for once. Shiro also toled me that the others were apparently looking for me everywhere thinking that I was kidnapped by Aizen. But I only ignored this info knowing If I let it get to me that it would only make hate myself even more than I already did. I thought at times I could hear someone calling me at time when I walked down streets to grocery shops for food. It seems that I had heard my name being called. I hoped that I could hide a little longer before I would eventually have to reveal myself. That was my last choice if this training to go any faster or my strength did not increase even more.

That night I tried very hard to go to sleep without having another memory. These visions of my past did not help with my training at all it seemed, but it did help with the giant whole in my heart that grew almost everyday. I decided I need fresh air so I went outside and jumped to the rooftop with ease. I looked out into the city and could see homes lit up with families eating dinner or telling each other good night. I could see in the distance that the city was lit up and the moon was high in the sky looking down on me making me remember the memoires even more.

I sighed bringing my knees into a fetal position and put my head in my hands trying desperately not to cry. I was almost ready to go in side when I heard voices coming down the road. Very familiar voices too.

I jumped to light post and roof tops as stealthy as I could trying not to make my presence known that all to familiar voice. I looked down from the roof top and saw the owner of the voices one being a person who used to play with me all the time even though we were not related felt like a brother to me. I say this yet my real brother was walking next to him as well all of his other friends.

The seemed to be coming this way and I knew the must be going to meet with Uruhara. Now I don't know what to over me but I just really couldn't help it at all when seeing those people who I used to know so well. I jumped down and began to follow them very closely knowing sooner or later they would notice me and turn around. It came sooner than I expected from my brother. I stopped under the light pole and stood there waiting. "Who's there!" my brother yelled and turning around with every one else turning as well.

Well needless to say the look on their faces was priceless even though a bit sad to say the least. My brother's eyes went wide and Ichigo completely went bonkers calling out my name before anyone else did. "Hikaru!" he yelled in a with relief than looked at with a tad bit of anger. "Where the hell have you been God damnit!" he yelled then started to walk to me with a very angry looking stride and a vein popping in his head. I just really wanted laugh at him then and I did but he only got angrier at me and stormed closer. But when he tried to grab me I jumped over him like it was nothing and landed softly behind him with him still standing there and turning around to look at me with shocked eyes. "H…How?" he spoke softly I only giggled and turned to stare at my brother and his crew. They only looked at me with shocked eyes and my brother might have acutually had tears in his eyes. I only gave them a big smile and jumped into the air with them looking at me while my silver hair blew in the wind. "Hikaru!" I heard my brother and Ichigo yell in unison. It pulled at my heart strings but I continued to fly off hoping the wouldn't follow.


End file.
